Robert Allen Stanford, the alleged mastermind of this month’s Ponzi scheme, once boasted of his plan for a private island mega-resort, a Club Med on steroids for the exponentially rich.  From Dealbook:

In an October 2008 article, Mr. Stanford told Forbes that he was planning to build an elite resort on what the magazine described as an “undisclosed island in the Caribbean.” At the time, Mr. Stanford said that he was working with 17 architectural and engineering firms to build 30 mansions for a development to be called the Islands Club.

Scheduled to open in 2011, it would have featured the largest private aviation complex in the world, Forbes said, with enough room to park 100 private jets as well as a jumbo marina with enough dock space for 30 massive yachts. The super-exclusive resort would require members to shell out a $50 million deposit, which would be refunded if they left the development. That was on top of the $15 million annual membership fee.

Dealbreaker took a James Bond angle:

All we need now is to blow up Tim Geithner’s seaplane with a solar powered laser and for Nick Nack to show up and start tempting regulators into a funhouse gun battle on the Man With The Golden Gun’s private island.

New York Magazine’s Daily Intel took its cue from “Lost,” pasting Stanford’s head on Ben’s parka-clad body as he was about to turn the wheel in the Orchid Station’s secret underground cavern (you can watch the show online).

I see a combination “Wall Street” sequel/“Apocalypse Now” tribute (is this a great pitch or what?):

• Bud Fox (Charlie Sheen) is finishing his time in a post-prison federal halfway house.  Men from an undefined agency visit him and make an offer; “terminate the Ponzi – with extreme prejudice” and he will receive a presidential pardon.  Charlie reprises his dad’s role in “Apocalypse” and gives the publicists a great marketing hook.

• Fox enlists mercenaries to take him on the boat trip to Stanford’s island compound.  Imagine his surprise when the mercenaries’ leader turns out to be Gordon Gekko (Michael Douglas).  Gekko has made his peace with his anger towards Fox for ratting him out, especially now that Gordon can act out his aggression on his clients’ perceived enemies.

• En route to the island, Fox watches a DVD of Stanford rambling on about his funds’ consistent, market-proof 14 percent returns.  “Listening to him on the DVD,” Fox’s narration intones, “it was obvious Stanford had gone completely insane.”

• The guys stop off at a grubby island backwater where they are treated to a cabaret show starring Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan and Kim Kardashian.  Oliver Stone makes a cameo as their dissipated, world-weary manager.

• They arrive at the island and find a bald, bloated Stanford ruling over a multi-mansion jungle compound populated by fugitive Mexican drug lords, has-been Republican Senators and deposed Wall Street kingpins who worship Stanford as a living God.  The bodies of corporate whistle-blowers and SEC regulators hang from the trees.  Stanford lumbers around babbling incoherently.

This is as far as I’ve taken it.  Just the time of day, you know?